A few days ago, The Man and I went to go see Shutter Island. I’d like to tell you it was because I was genuinely interested in the plot but really it was because I read somewhere that one of my fantasy boyfriends on the kitchen pass list, Leonardo DiCaprio was in EVERY SINGLE SCENE. 218 minutes of Leo sounded like bliss to me.
Boy was I wrong. Take it from me, if you must see this movie, make it a Blockbuster night and fortify yourself with copious amounts of wine….you’re gonna need it.
Wait, where was I?
Oh yes, the kitchen pass list. The list that The Man would turn a blind eye on in the unlikely event I was ever to bump into one of these beautiful men, have him fall madly in love with me for no more than a few nights and sweep me off my feet into his private jet to take in the Opera in San Francisco, all the while decorating my neck with Harry Winston jewels and allowing me to shop on his credit card on Rodeo Drive. (You say run on sentence? I say clear and concise summation of entire Pretty Woman plot line. Pfft.)
Anyway. Let’s take it from the bottom up (heh heh) shall we?
Number Five: Bradley Cooper.
Admittedly his stock was much higher right after The Hangover came out but then he started dating Renee Zellweger (Sorry people, I’m just not seeing it…). He remains on the list though because I can totally picture myself riding in a convertible with him, leaning over to slowly pull of his aviator glasses and gazing into his blue eyes as he….. Wait. This is not that kind of blog.
Number Four: Leonardo DeCaprio
Leo used to occupy the number two position but had to be punished for the above referenced 218 minutes of my life that I will never get back. Those blue eyes, that curly hair…I can tell you with absolute certainty I would go down with him. People, I’m talking about on The Titanic. Get your minds out of the gutter. Geez.
Number Three: Robert Pattinson
The only thing keeping this teenage vampire from being number one on my kitchen pass list is the fact that when he is not in “Edward” mode, he really looks like he needs a good scrubbing in the bathtub. Wait….I just had an idea.
Number Two: Hugh Grant
This is a tricky one. Not only because my adorable Scottish friend Ally from The Reluctant Subrubanite is real life friends with him, but also because it’s possible that I might have been “over served” at the Ritz Carlton Reynold’s Plantation outside Atlanta while in a rather small bar area with him. It’s also entirely possible that I might have, maybe loudly , slurred something rather insulting at him. Possibly. Or not. Still, he has great hair and blue eyes and that accent? OH. YES.
Number One: Harry Connick, Jr.
Not only does he have the requisite wavy, thick hair and blue eyes, I already have photographic proof that he is my new boyfriend. I mean sure, I stood there for about one minute but still…Kismet I tell you. Nevermind that security had to drag me off and he is actually married to a Victoria’s Secret supermodel. Details, details. The main thing is that I get to use this picture as many times as possible in my blog. Because I can.
So tell me dear readers, who is on your kitchen pass list? I want juicy details and reminders of anyone I’ve left out.
I’m counting on you for some good comment reading so bring it on!
{ 35 comments… read them below or add one }
Oh jeeze – my list? You just named most of them! Thanks for the pictures that I’ll be drooling over all night!
Gigi´s last blog ..My "AHA Moment" about Twitter
Hands down Gerard Butler.
Followed closely by Chris O’Donnell. Ashton Kutcher and George Clooney on the opposite ends of the age spectrum.
the mayor´s last blog ..Show Me What? & Other Random Thoughts
Hmmm. I will have to give some thought to my list. I will not fight you for any of your men, though. Not my type, I guess.
Oh, man. Despite that fact that I am the whitest white girl you ever met, my crushes tend to be on bald, black men.
Michael Jordan and Denzel Washington are on the top of my list, for sure. (Cut Denzel, not schlumpy Book of Eli Denzel.) But I can get behind the adorableness of Ashton Kutcher (those Nikon commercials slay me), the hilariousness of Peyton Manning, and the aw shucks boy next door charm of Drew Brees. What can I say? I have a wide, eclectic set of interests. (I almost forget about the silver fox Anderson Cooper…oooohhh…the stuff of my teenage dreams…)
NGS´s last blog ..45 x 365 #318
Let’s forget for a moment that I’m a middle-aged woman with a penchant for
Patrick Stewart middle-aged British men and would die before I admitted I have a thing for Daniel Radcliffe because I really don’t want to admit that I’m a dirty old woman…but Hugh Grant? Robert Pattinson? REALLY???Okay…maybe Robert Pattinson. But only as Cedric Diggory – I’d gladly see Stephenie Meyer drawn and quartered. *twitch*
Jan´s last blog ..RTT: Because Death by Honey Cruller Would Be a Bad Way To Go
Well, dang. My strikethrough didn’t work.
Sorry about that. It was just supposed to strikethrough Patrick Stewart.
Jan´s last blog ..RTT: Because Death by Honey Cruller Would Be a Bad Way To Go
Renee looks like a sweaty coke whore. That’s right. I said it. Noticeably missing from your list? My favorite red head. Do you remember who’s on Jeremy’s Kitchen Pass List? Suzie from down the street.
Steenky Bee´s last blog ..Gettin’ Fit and Gettin’ Random
You said “with” not “on” so I knew exactly what you were talking about. ‘Over served’ I hate it when that happens. And, it seems to happen a lot to me.
Michele´s last blog ..RTT = Waggle, Witches, and Wishes
Oh, yeah, Harry’s my #1!
Sprite’s Keeper´s last blog ..HASAY: Does this count as a birthday card?
I don’t have a pass list, just a list.
You mentioned just about everyone on my list except George Clooney because, well just yum.
I still have a thing for Pierce Brosnan, again, yum.
And you know I’m Team Edward but holy six pack abs Taylor Lautner!
Bobbi´s last blog ..Not A Boy, Will Never Be A Man
I did see a gal riding with Bradley Cooper the other day. Was it you?
Mo´s last blog ..The Delinquent Pigeon
OK, my list is a little strange by most standards. None of the men having anything in common….because I’m a moody bitch and I like to switch it up a little (even though I’m faithfully and lovingly married to the same man for 13 years). Anywho……
Seth Rogen – because he’s Jewish, funny and sexy
Jon Stewart – because he’s Jewish, funny and sexy
Jeff Goldblum – because he’s Jewish, funny and sexy (alright maybe there is a few things in common with these men)
Ami James – because he looks like the kind of man who would throw me around the bedroom (and he’s Jewish and sexy)
Bill from Trueblood – because he plays an effin’ vampire and has that sexy accent on the show
inannasstar´s last blog ..Wisdom Wednesdays – Growth
What can I say? I go for bald guys. Also? My brother lives in Reynold’s Plantation, and my SIL works at the RC. She gets to see hot famous guys (and not-so-hot ones) all the time. She has good self-control.
middle-aged-woman´s last blog ..RTT: Random With a Guest
Bradley Cooper, yes. The others? Not so much. I’m more of a Pierce Brosnan kind of girl. (Dating myself, yes.)
The Mother´s last blog ..I’m Confused…
I’m going to have to put mine out there in no particular order, as it changes almost daily…
* Pierce Brosnan – cause he can sing, looks FABULOUS in a suit, and could read the phone book to me and melt me
* Ewan McGregor – he can sing too, has a quirky sense of humor, mmm love accents, and has a cute touche
* Brendan Fraser – makes me laugh, mmmm that body, and I sink into his eyes
* Ryan Reynolds – makes me laugh, mmmm that body, and I sink into his eyes
* Chris Noth – he’s a smart ass and knows how to use sarcasm, I LOVE deep sexy voices, and if he ever asked me out I’d TOTALLY answer with: “Abso-f***ing-lutely”
Dorsey´s last blog ..Oh my aching legs!!
I have a couple of different methods of this list.
Traditional – Hugh Grant(who knocked off David Letterman), Adam Sandler, Pierce Brosnan, Peyton Manning, Matthew McConaughey
Chef – Anthony Bourdain, Eric Rippert, Bobby Flay, Jamie Oliver
and British – Orlando Bloom, Prince William, Colin Firth, David Beckham, Hugh Grant!!!
- Hugh Grant makes two of my three lists because he is that damn HOT!
MommyLisa´s last blog ..WW: Acadamy Award Nominee…
I COMPLETELY agree with you about P-Ratz.
Robert Downey Jr. is at the top of my list right now. Followed closey by Gerard Butler and Bradley Cooper.
Also, McDreamy is always on there.
My list would have, in no particular order: Brendan Frasier, Matt Damon, Sean Connery (I know, old but still), Leonardo DeCaprio, and Pierce Brosnan.
VandyJ´s last blog ..Post-it note time with Supah
First off, thank you for the “Titanic” clarification.
In answer to the question: The Maven do love her some Bruce Willis. Period.
The Dental Maven´s last blog ..Man Loses Teeth to Exploding Cigarette
ah, that was fun. Here’s my list: http://gooseyspot.blogspot.com/2010/03/free-pass.html
lisa´s last blog ..Free pass
OMG, I’m laughing at what Steenky said.
And honey girl, the kitchen pass thing is real! My husband KNOWS that if Clive Owen came knocking, I would be rocking. He would be like, “Yes, he’s a very handsome man, best get to it.”
Bradley Cooper is adorable but do you think he’d treat you right?
Becky´s last blog ..Not My Scene. Not Not Not.
Mmmmm…The Ryans – Gosling and Reynolds. In no particular order, or in any order at all. Then Kiefer Sutherland, David Boreanez, the dude who plays the vampire on the BBC show Being Human even though I can’t think of his name right now, and maybe Bradley Cooper if I wasn’t too tired.
foradifferentkindofgirl (fadkog)´s last blog ..here’s a post that will leave you unsure what to comment so you’ll probably say something like ‘sorry?’ and then avoid eye contact with me
nice list, stiletto!
harry connick jr is a good one.
i am a super nerd so my list has the guy that builds schools for children in northern pakistan, the guy that invented the cheetah prosthetic legs, james the brother of jesus…
i used to have matthew mcaughnhey on my list, simply because of geography. i visit austin frequently. maybe i’ll run into him at a gas station or Round Rock IKEA or a hiking trail on Town Lake.
harry connick is yum but michael buble is where it’s at. *BIG SIGH*
MommyNamedApril´s last blog ..Cookies! Everything is Better with Cookies!
Hugh’s thing for the transvestite hookers way back when procludes him from being on any of my lists…but I have great nostalgia for the Four Weddings and a Funeral days.
I don’t actually have a list – but if I did it would be full of random semi-famous actors. For some reason, they lose appeal for me when they hit it big. Loved Bradley Cooper when he was on Alias – but now that he’s a star? Not so much. What does this say about me?
Bradley Cooper makes me swoon. Also, George Clooney takes spots 1-4.
I agree with most of yours…. Love the dark haired men. Just to add a few:
Clive Owen
Jon Hamm (Don Draper from Mad Men)
George Clooney
Christian Bale (although I think he’s an a-hole)
So, my question is: if these are men your Man won’t mind if you go down with, wash or do whatever to….who are the guys he would be opposed to?
Beth´s last blog ..Red, White and Blue
Nice List.
Chris Gorham
Connie @ Young and Relentless´s last blog ..Bring on the Fabulous!
Heck anyone would be hard put to hold their tongue around Hugh Grant. I’m glad you slurred something!
But where is Patrick McDreamy Dempsey? Be still my beating heart.
Glad to see old Tom Cruise got edged out. ; )
Lawyer Mom´s last blog ..Eeyore? Sure. But Not Today.
My gosh just give me Hugh and Bradley!!! Also, Tim McGraw with his hat on!
Or if I were in a movie and could be Debra or Julia…Richard Geere. Not the real life Richard though. lol
For years, Jason Statham was at the top of my list.
Gerard Butler has moved to the top-he’s hot NO matter what he does.
Gladiator? Yup. Murderer? Check. Not a very good Phantom of the Opera? Even then. Dancing with Katherine Heigl who annoys me? Still check. Dead husband stalking his wife? I’d still jump him.
Really? Hugh?????
DCUrbanDad´s last blog ..Mini-Kamp, sometimes people aren’t who you think they are
I can get on the Hugh bandwagon. If just for Notting Hill alone.
Also a check on Robert Downey, Jr. who someone else mentioned. Is it bad that I still have a thing for Harrison Ford? In the Han Solo, Indiana Jones era?
justmakingourway´s last blog ..She
One big drag about getting older is that I’ve had to start worrying about the “age appropriate” issue on my own personal “Kitchen Pass List”. I mean, Robert Pattinson? I was with my first husband when this boy was born! When I was a kid, I could fantasize about older men, and the age difference didn’t seem so icky, but the reverse gets to feeling a little dirty old womanish.