We are in the home stretch folks. The days of me torturing you Every. Single. Day. are almost over. I’ve really started to run out of things to talk about, which is really shocking for me…so, I’m going to tell you about my day yesterday and today.
This time of year marks a special season in the Stiletto house. Bitchmas. It starts when we unload the crates of holiday decorations and ends the minute they are all put into place, lights twinkling, house looking glorious and I magically turn into Holiday Martha, singing, cooking and happily addressing Christmas cards. Something inside me snaps at the start of Bitchmas. It starts the minute I get everything out of storage. I’m not sure if it’s the fact the house is in total and utter destruction for a good week or if it’s just the sheer volume of the what I have to put out. You decide.
If you were to count, that is well over 15 boxes massive crates of crap I have to unpack. And that total does not include the Christmas Tree or all the garlands or outside lights. This, of course being no one’s fault but my own. I’ve started my own Griswold Family Christmas and I can’t seem to get myself under control.
Normally the entire family will hide from me, or better yet leave for a few days hours, while the endless cursing decorating festivities are under way. This year, however, The Man has an industrial case of the flu and is barely able to move so everyone is all in for the decorations.
So yesterday and today, I’ve done nothing but decorate…I am crabby and my fingers hurt from getting poked with faux pine needles. Also, they are covered in dust so I have to shake everything out and then vacuum relentlessly after to keep my allergies in check. The only fun moments of this process are watching the kids hang their ornaments on the tree and that’s only if they don’t fight for tree position. Those perfect children from Thanksgiving? Yeah, they moved on to another house and I have my two battle warriors back in the home court.
It should all be over by tomorrow and I will post some pictures. Hopefully it turns out all magical and sparkly…if not, I will go into full OCD mode and re-arrange every day up until the 25th.
So…y’all want to come over and hang out and listen to me bitch gather ’round a roaring fire and sing Christmas carols? Just let me know!
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LOL, you perfectly described the next week at our house – can’t wait to see the pix. I think you need to find yourself some Bitchmas music…maybe a great theme song? Hope your DH is feeling better soonest and the kids remember some of their better moments! Am I really first?!
Oh my goodness, you have a lot of Xmas stuff! We’re still in the young children phase of decorating…. I’m barely going to bring anything down from the attic since it would require putting a Fort Knox gate around it so the kids don’t smash it up. My mom decorates like you… I called her today and her back hurt from unloading all of the decorations from the attic, she won’t get them all in the perfect spot for at least another week. Good luck decorating!
I will miss your daily posts. I have no decorations for my new house… what do you suggest I start with? I’m hoping to be up to 15 boxes in no time!!!
You are amazing. I could never do it. I have trouble motivating myself for window clings. 15 boxes? I’d hide for certain; flu or no flu.
Seriously, I just took pictures of my totes too. Ugh.
And it is bitchmas when it comes time to pack it all back up again. I start dreaded THAT job about 10 minutes after I put it all out…
Why, Mary Ann? WHY?
being a minimalist, i have gotten a little nauseated over my five christmas totes- which includes (in the tradition of all the women in my family) christmas dishes!
why don’t i just come over to your house with some spiked egg nog and forget about this decorating nonsense.
wow. i haven’t unpacked a single christmas item the last two years. just can’t bring myself to do it. i have many boxes, but you’ve definitely beat me. i hate to think of how much dust mine have collected, but i’m not going to find out this year!
Sounds like it’s happy hour at the Stiletto Household. I made a deal with me and I can get out my Christmas stuff when I’m caught up on the laundry.
Hmmmm….maybe in five years?
You know what ticks me off? I just wrote a celebratory post about Nablopomo being OVER! YEAH!!!
And then? I realized it is Nov 29, not the 30th.
I HAVE ANOTHER DAY OF CRAPPY POSTING LEFT.
So unfair.
Sounds familiar
I actually took a photo of all my boxes today…… I have a ton. Can nto wait to see the photos and love the tem bitchmas
We celebrate the same holiday! But a much bigger celebration at our house is Martin Luther King Jr. Day, for that is the day work gives me a paid holiday to take down my Bitchmas décor. It’s true, I’m totally the girl who leaves everything up WAY too long. But isn’t it wonderful when everything is down after the holidays? My home suddenly seems less cluttered and more spacious. Can’t wait to see your garland, lights and all your Santas!
No where in this post is the mention of the amount of wine you had to drink in order to put up those 15 big ass boxes of bitchmas decorations. I’m pretty sure that at my house things would have been pretty askew by 4pm. I can’t wait to see the results.
Fifteen boxes?
I heart you so much.
There shall be no Bitchmas decorations in this house this year–we wont be home for it, so why bother. Just more crap to get out and put up and who wants to do that?
But I will join you in the joy of the bitchmas season
Oh my god…I was the biggest a-hole today for no other reason than my housecleaning before putting up decorations was driving me insane. I feel like I have to clean it top to bottom before I cover it with Xmas crap. My poor husband and children…it’s a good thing I’m staying up past 1am to blog and pay bills so I’m an even bigger bitch tomorrow!
I love “Bitchmas.” What a perfect turn of phrase for how I feel when lugging all those boxes down from the attic! I haven’t started yet and this post made me want to put off starting until, oh let’s say, forever.
I do love the time after it’s all up and pretty and sparkly. But, man the getting there really is tough. I feel your pain!
I have about teh same amount of crap that you do. My thought this year? Thank goodness we are moving to a bigger house so I have more places to put all of this stuff!
Everything is up except for the tree and outdoor lights, which I still have to buy because my lights never last more than 1 year!
OMFG are you related to my mom? She does the same exact thing and it scares me. I personally have never had to do any “real” christmas decorating of my own house because we always go to her house, and this year I will be lucky if I have my furniture by Christmas, so maybe I will bring out my own inner decorating bitch next year. Never know, maybe she will make a small appearance this year.
What the? 15 boxex.
Did you leave a child in there last Christmas?
Getting the boxes out and decorating is exhausting, but at least I get my garage back for a month!
Seriously? 15 boxes? Are you storing last year’s snow in there too? Okay, read what I wrote and Tara’s was much better. Comment props, Tara!
15 boxes, that is nothing. Try 27 boxes for Closed Captioning!
Oh I am so totally there!! My house is completely devoid of anything Holiday. My husband still has not chosen when to make the purchases (yeah, we threw everything from last year away so we are starting from scratch!)
Aww, I strive to gather that much Christmas stuff to decorate with! Well, okay, how about half of that, cause really that many boxes would block my living room for sure. And was that, an invite? cause I just booked my tickets! anyone who turns into Christmas Martha, I wanna come stay at your house for a few days! ha ha ha and you dont even know me. lucky you! I totally cant wait to see pics of the after decorated space. Happy Holidays!
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