Eighteen Is The New Four

So the newest season of The Duggars (or is this a new show? I don’t know.) premieres tonight on Discovery. Do you care? I am all for the big family, don’t get me wrong. I’m an Irish Catholic for Pete’s sake…but this? Is a little bit over the top and I’m not sure how I feel about them putting their childrens lives on TV to pay for it. I mean seriously…she suprised her existing 17 kids with the announcement of her 18th pregnancy on national TV. I’m sure I will make some people mad with this post but honestly, a little restraint and good judgement about exposing your family can go a long way folks. Have as many as you want, just do us all a favor and do it in private.

I sort of care in a “I need to see this train wreck” sort of way. This poster I found while researching for this post (yes, really!) sort of sums it all up.

Now ordinarily, I would say it’s not nice to pick on people like this. But…they have opened themselves up with this show. Like I said, have as many as you want…just don’t make your children a public spectacle at the tender age of, well…birth to pay for it all. Jim Bob is a real estate agent. Now either he is the very best real estate agent in all of Arkansas or he and Michelle are making a tidy little sum off having all these kids and having us gawk at them on TV. I’m guessing the latter.

Here are a few fun, and somewhat horrifying, Duggar family facts:

Michelle Duggar has been pregnant for 135 months of her life.

Average time between births is 18 months.

Estimated Duggar diapers thus far? 90,000 and soon to be counting.

Every member of the Duggar family with the exception of Michelle has a name that starts with J. The kids names are (take a big deep breath now…): Joshua, Jana, John-David, Jill, Jessa, Jinger, Joseph, Josiah, Joy-Anna, Jedidiah, Jerimiah, Jason, James, Justin, Jackson, Johanna and finally, Jennifer.

Discovery Channel has a Name Baby 18 poll going on. I’m becoming tired from all these J names, in the interest of brevity the top names according to the fools like me who voted are Juliette and Jacob.

They didn’t take into account the name I suggested: JustStopIt

If you care, and have not passed out from this post, you can watch a family morph into a small village tonight on the Discovery Channel. I may need a vat of wine to get through this one.

Comments

  1. HeatherPride says:

    Like you, I have been captivated by every Duggar special that has aired on the Discovery Channel. While I think they’re largely flaunting their reproductive super powers, there is another part of me that wonders why the hell I can’t manage to keep one 4-year old in line while all their children act so…..perfect? Or maybe it’s the cameras and awesome editing. Still, though….

    And you just can’t make this up: seriously….Jim Bob? Arkansas? the HAIR??? it’s like a caricature

  2. DCD says:

    Somehow this has all passed me by. I have never heard of these people! And I kind of wish I hadn’t now.

    Seriously – 11+ year of your life pregnant? Yuck. And I’m w/Heather, two kids exhaust me and often have me pulling my hair out. What the F is up with the Stepford children?

    Okay – I didn’t mean that to sound mean. I worked an overnight last night and now am stuck at my job until 11pm tonight on a 3 hour catnap. I’m a bit testy…

    But STILL!

  3. Tina says:

    The first time I saw this family on tv I was a little creeped out. They have a “cultish” kind of feel to them. Totally agree with you though, have as many kids as you want, just don’t pimp them out on tv to make money.

  4. Stop, stop, stop. She treats her Va-jay-jay like a convenience store. Clean, open all day, every day except for Christmas. Give it a rest. (BTW: I totally stole that line fro a tv show) But it’s fitting isn’t it? I’m from Utah, the land of many, many large families (no one is a polygamist here) and I am shocked and the sheer size of that family. It’s time to shut the old cooter down.

    Sorry for saying “Va-jay-jay” and “cooter” on your blog. You rock. I owe you an email.

  5. Kate says:

    Considering the fact that I call Eleanor, “Oliver” – Oliver, “Chris” (my husband) – George, “Eleanor” – and Chris, “George” on a regular basis….I don’t think I’d be able to keep track of all of those Js…

    Personally – I could barely stand being pregnant twice. It’s not for me. And that’s all I could think about when I saw this show (I THINK I’ve seen it before). That woman has been pregnant for most of her married life!

  6. I think I peed a little when I saw the picture.

  7. anna says:

    Yeah, I’ve heard about these people from the Jon and Kate Plus 8 fans who come to my site. They are really kind of a trainwreck, but the weird, possibly inbred kind of trainwreck, and I’m not sure I can get into that. Like, people who wear french braids and Gunne Sax dresses kind of trainwreck.

    That said, I’ll probably watch anyway.

  8. “It’s time to shut the old cooter down.” Jenboglass, truer words have never been spoken.

    Just because you CAN have 18 children that doesn’t mean you SHOULD have 18 children. It’s like they’re growing their own religious sect. Weird.

  9. CK Lunchbox says:

    ya, I wrote a post on this a few months back, the premise being, how could you possibly give that many kids the individual love and attention they not just need but deserve as part of their development. As I understand it, there’s a sign up sheet on the fridge for kids who don’t think they are getting enough mommy or daddy time. One more kid, and they’ll have to start filling out a form. Next it will be like my taxes.

    And I’m with you, why front the kids? It feels like a form of exploitation.

    Of course I write all this, and then get a comment from my sister the next day. She lives in Arkansas, and has good friends who are good friends with the Duggars. She also has a blog who her good friend reads and by extension, reads mine as well. You can figure out the rest.

    Then she tells me, “You know they tried to sell us a car?”

    “Who did?”

    “The oldest Duggar.” Guess he’s car salesman now.

  10. Keely says:

    That is one of those phenomena of which I was only vaguely, peripherally aware, and now I have more information than I wanted. Thanks a lot, now I have to gouge that part of my brain out again.
    I like your name suggestion though. I would totally name my 18th kid that, because by that point I would be COMPLETELY INSANE.

  11. Seriously, if I was married to a man with this apparent super-powered sperm, I would pretend to be asleep if he so much as tapped me on the shoulder.

    While I respect the fact that they have order in the midst of an environment that could fall into chaos easily, i just don’t think I’ll ever understand this group. However, sigh, I continue to watch the specials like I was pulling up to an accident scene.

  12. Jim says:

    Wow, this is the first time I’ve been exposed to this. While I’m not inspired to watch it, I am inspired to print out that picture and hang it in my office.

    The PC police may not let me though. I feel a tussle coming on…

  13. Ann says:

    As I started to read this post I clicked to make a new window to find a certain “poster” that would be perfect. Than I scrolled down and you already had it!
    Fantastic!
    It’s true Mrs. Duggar. It’s NOT a clown car.
    I get a ‘mentally unstable’ vibe from these parents.

  14. margie says:

    I hate to be the lone voice of opposition here- but… I don’t have a problem with them. I’m sure they are making money off of the show, but the dad also has a chain of dealerships and I heard some real estate etc and I think was a congressman at one time- so I’m not going to judge them for how they pay for things- they are doing it themselves and not on foodstamps and welfare.

    Also, I don’t know how many of the commenters are pro-choice- but doesn’t choice also include the right to have as many kids as you want? Most people wouldn’t dream of chiming in to ridicule a woman for how many abortions she has had… that would be closed minded and judgemental.

    We could go on all day about how much attention each child receives etc- but I have seen plenty of families with only a couple of kids that get neglected just fine.

    Anyway- I’m not trying to start a debate here over choice, child labor, world overpopulation, the criminality of giant bangs and the overuse of cream of mushroom soup in cooking (yes- I’ve seen the show)- …love your blog- not a hater, I promise! Just my 2 cents-

  15. Mary Anne says:

    Oh Margie, leave it to you to stir the pot. :) First of all, I welcome your 2 cents! I get a little full of myself sometimes, I need people to bring me back down to earth.

    Just so you know, I don’t care how many kids they have and I would never in a million years be the person to say when to stop. I think 18 is excessive…but that is their choice. My problem is that they put these kids on tv. I’ve got a 10 year old who would die if I exposed our family to a national audience and I’m not sure I would ever be comfortable making that decision for him. Thats my biggest issue. Well, that and her bangs. :) As far as attention per child goes, I agree with you…they do better than some parents with two.

    Always feel free to pop in and disagree, it’s really almost impossible to offend me!

  16. margie says:

    Thank you so much for being gracious to me and my big… erm… spoon (for stirring the pot-hee-hee)! Yes, besides the bangs- one wonders how all the kids feel about the media- I do like to watch it though. I mean, a pantry with a roll up, garage door (for ease in unloading all that cream of mushroom soup) and a fountain drink dispenser in the dining room- you gotta admit that is sweet!

  17. vodkamom says:

    that is the funniest damn poster ever. And, is that mommy insane? I mean, i love kids and all, but it might have been easier ( and less painful) to become a teacher.

  18. Chris says:

    Those people wig me out. And yet I’m drawn to their trainwreckness.

  19. Jett says:

    I’d never even heard of this family until this week, and now I’m seeing references to them EVerywhere. The jury is still out, but I’m sort of leaning toward ‘horrified’ where they are concerned and each new tidbit of information I read about them sends me closer to that exact conclusion.

    Your suggestion for a name? Made my husband come see what the hell was going on because I was laughing so hard.

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