Hey y’all, lots of great entries…see, when you throw out something as valuable as a $25 gift card people respond. That’s extreme marketing for you right there.
As I mentioned, I have no interest in being in charge here so I turned the responsibility over to my MIL and my SIL who were both in agreement that the lucky, lucky winner was Beth over at Emtnester! Her hilarioius story below:
“It had been exactly one month since I dropped my youngest child at college, leaving me to my empty nest. Not all together horrible except for the very unfortunate fact that I have gained exactly 2.5 pounds each of those weeks. I don’t think my exercise and eating habits have changed that much but it is clear that something has to give. This week, it was my new grey dress pants that decided to give.
I joined a traditional network group to expose my blog and also to make me get out of my pj’s before noon at least once a week. We were required to attend a training session today, which I dutifully arrived 30 seconds before the speaker began. Rushing to sit down in my seat, I heard a “swoosht” sound and realized my pants had split in the center back seam. I wanted to put my fingers back there and figure out just how big the split was, but was afraid the people behind me would think I was picking at my bottom. (Gross!)
The speaker begins with our first exercise and is asking different people to stand up and read certain passages in the manual. I cannot focus. (Please do not call on me and if she does, can I refuse?). Next we stand and introduce ourselves, so I quickly place my notebook over my bottom with my hands to cleverly hide my wide open (wrong day to wear my cute green thong undies) rear. I announce that I am a BLOGGER and everyone turns around and collectively says, “what?”.
Finally, class is over. I plan my quick getaway hoping never to see any of these people again, but I cannot even get up. My desk is surrounded by the curious; a blog can be a job? (yes, if you’re good like Heather Armstrong); will you blog for my website? (yes, what amount should I charge?). I am forced to sit and stay and answer every question until the room has filed out and only the teacher remained.
“Couldn’t get up because of the split in your pants?”, she said. I must have looked stunned and she follwed with, “I heard it when you sat down”.”
Congrats Beth! Shoot me an email with your address and I will have your loot on it’s way to you…don’t spend it all in one place!
Also, thanks to everyone who participated and gave me a good laugh….and Captain Dumbass? Tell your wife she needs to make you some more pie!
{ 43 comments }
Oh, poor Beth! Poor, poor Beth. That happened to me during a job interview once. I got the job – I’m not sure how, though!!
OMG, that’s horrible! Beth definitely deserves the prize
Yeah, after I read hers, I thought, “Okay, that pretty much trumps everybody”.
Hey, at least ya got some bloggy love out of it, Beth!
I am so excited to win this major award. Maybe I will use the money to get my pants fixed….on second thought, I think I’d rather get some fancy little cupcakes.
Thanks so much!
Good gravy. That’s hilarious and horrible all at the same time. Quite deserving of a gift card.
i love your blog! it is really funny and i admire you for being a ‘stiletto mom’. i use to be one as well, but after chasing and carrying two toddlers on the grassy playground or through the sanbox, i soon became a ‘ballet-flat mom’! …i still have not been able to part with my 80+ pairs of heels tho… keep up the funny posts!
Yay, Beth!
Although perhaps you would have preferred not to win because maybe then your pants would still be intact. We are laughing with you, you know.
Stiletto Mom, your family chose wisely. I hope the loot will be useful for fixing those pants. Your shoe vs elevator story coupled with Beth’s pants make a duo that probably won’t be fighting crime anytime soon…at least not until she’s visited a tailor and you’ve seen a cobbler.
They don’t have cobblers any more do they? Aren’t they just shoe repair shops? Why am I suddenly stuck in Midievil Times?
Oh Jen, leave it to you to get stuck in a time warp…
Did i miss a god dammed contest? Man, I suck.
Vodka Mom? ROFLMAO….thank you.
Go Beth! Laughter heals all mortifying moments — and we’re healing yours. Bask in the glory, bask in the glory.
Good choice for the contest winner. I checked out Beth’s website, emtnester, and she has other really funny articles. I think one of the best ones out there – great for a morning laugh. Everyone needs one! Check it out. Good luck.
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